The Importance of Motivation
You might have seen the story of a girl who won a running competition barefoot. It went viral online. Stories like these grab our attention because they show us how strong determination can lead to success. Now, you might think that if you couple that same determination with a good pair of sneakers, you’d get someone breaking world speed records. But in reality, the perfect mix of top-notch equipment and intense motivation is rare. This makes sense because, for someone who already has all the best gear, winning another race might not be a big deal. But for a girl without sneakers, this race was probably the biggest and most important thing she could compete in. That’s why her motivation to win was on a whole different level.
Approaching a Goal Without Motivation – Why is This Still Bad for You?
It’s amazing how much motivation can impact what we achieve. When we reach a goal driven by passion and determination, the sense of fulfillment is unbeatable. On the flip side, reaching a goal without motivation can have a lot of downsides. Even if you succeed by luck or because there’s no competition, you might not feel the real joy of accomplishment and get a false sense of what achieving a goal truly feels like. This can make it harder to stay motivated in the future.
More often, though, you might fail to reach your goal due to a lack of motivation. You might wonder, “Why bother if the goal wasn’t that important anyway?” The goal might not have been crucial, but your time, energy, and enthusiasm are limited resources. If you keep wasting these on such unimportant objectives, you might find yourself feeling hazy, distracted, and completely drained when your true goal finally comes along, with not enough time and energy to prepare and succeed.
The lesson here is clear: If you lack the burning desire to win a contest, secure a university spot, find a job, or build your dream relationship – no matter what – then it’s not worth engaging. In other words, at any given goal you must be sufficiently motivated to give your best effort and succeed. Otherwise, it’s just a waste of time, and your motivation could be put to better use.
Chasing Someone Else’s Goals
I’ve seen so many people chasing the wrong goals, and I was one of them at one point. It might seem strange and counterintuitive – why would anyone spend their valuable time, often their best years, on something trivial? The answer is simple: they were chasing someone else’s goals. I had a sense of this before, but it became clear to me after reading “The Cafe on the Edge of the World.” by John Strelecky. Ambitious people often need others to help them achieve their big goals. Corporate leaders, for example, need you to buy their products. Similarly, people around you might need you to follow their plan to reach their objectives faster. How do they convince you to do this? By making you believe that their goals are yours.
As a result, you might find yourself striving for things like the latest iPhone, which isn’t much different from the previous one, or pursuing a career your father wanted, even if your talents and interests lie elsewhere. This is how you end up wasting time and energy on goals that aren’t really yours.
Recognizing and Avoiding Imposed Goals
Some imposed goals are easy to recognize, while others are more difficult to spot. Things can be so cunningly arranged or cleverly put that it’s hard not to fall into these traps. But the main task isn’t just to recognize these false goals; it’s to identify your true ones. Humans are wired to strive for something, and when we don’t have our own aspirations, someone else’s goals can easily fill that void.
Once you figure out what you truly want, you’ll still need to fend off those who try to steal your time and resources for their own needs. While you won’t be completely immune to distractions, knowing your true goals will give you a reason to resist them. You’ll have the motivation to direct all your resources toward achieving what really matters to you.
The Real Secret to Motivation
Why do I focus so much on goals instead of motivation? Because that’s the entire secret. No magical exercises can help you develop motivation unless it’s already there. Motivational techniques became popular as a response to imposed goals. In media we’re often shown a stereotypical dream life, like a “perfect” family in a house with two cute kids and a dog, all smiling and seemingly happy (there are more alterations to this, but I’m sure you got the idea). There are many people, who take something like this image as their goal but then lack motivation for making it happen. If you ever find yourself in such a situation, before enrolling in any motivational programs, try questioning if this vision of happiness actually aligns with your true self.
For this, you need to understand your true desires and aspirations, to see if your current goals will actually fulfill them. Maybe a house in the suburbs or even kids aren’t for you. Maybe you’d prefer a studio apartment with a view of Central Park and a bike. It sounds simple, but without this foundation of self-awareness, all motivation techniques will only have a temporary effect, if any.
If you’ve discarded false goals but haven’t found your own, start searching with the same enthusiasm as you would approach any other goal. Conduct research, try different things, and test yourself to discover what you truly like and what you’re good at. Once you do, you’ll immediately see how true motivation comes from pursuing the right goals that will bring you genuine happiness. You’ll be amazed at how you naturally stop spending time on social media or attending uninteresting events. You’ll start to see clearly what brings you closer to your goal and what pulls you away, making choices much easier. Every day will feel like the start of an exciting journey.
How This Works in Real Life
Who hasn’t gotten up at 5 AM for a flight to a long-awaited vacation? The trip to the airport and a five-hour flight aren’t exactly fun, but they’re bearable when they lead to a carefully chosen hotel by the sea. Whether it’s sand or pebbles, a buffet or a restaurant, you know exactly what you want and race there at full speed. Why not apply the same principle to choosing goals? If work is just a step toward a goal you’re passionate about – like buying a perfect house that you will then decorate in your favorite colors – you don’t need any tricks to get up and go to work.
But what if you’re flying to a resort you don’t like because you let others choose? While you were too busy dealing with other less important travel arrangements, the hotel turned out to be disappointing, and the flight time – 26 hours. It wouldn’t be as joyful to get up at 5 AM. Maybe you’d even sleep through the alarm and feel relieved that you didn’t go. Who would be so careless with their vacation? And with their life?
Unfortunately, many people become so caught up in busyness that they go through life on autopilot, endlessly completing tasks and to-do lists without pausing to consider what truly matters to them. Some work so much that they even lose sight of where they are going or what they are saving for. Or worse – their savings end up being eaten up by medical bills after they accumulate health problems from endless stress at work.
Balancing Multiple Goals
Now, let’s look at another scenario. This time you’ve bought a good ticket and chosen a hotel, but you still lack the motivation to get up at 5 AM to catch your early morning flight. The alarm rings, and you don’t want to get out of bed. Consider this: maybe there are more important unresolved tasks blocking you? For instance, if you dig deeper, your true goal might be to find a partner. You might be unhappy with your appearance and lack time to exercise due to exhausting work. The mere thought of walking on the beach not in your best shape might deter you from the trip. So, what then? Not go at all?
In life, we often have multiple goals at the same time. For example, improving your personal life might be your primary goal, while relaxing is a secondary one. Lack of motivation for secondary goals, like going on a trip, happens when they don’t support or even hinder your primary goal, such as getting in shape and finding a partner. Once you identify your main goal, you can find ways to balance the others. For instance, you could plan to use the hotel gym daily and run along the seashore each morning during your vacation. This way, your trip becomes an opportunity to move closer to your main goal, not further away. As you can already picture yourself returning from vacation all tanned and fit, you can’t wait to go.
Personal Experience: Finding True Motivation
Let me share a personal example. For years, I knew I needed more physical activity. I set goals to lose weight, tone up, and see abs, but nothing worked. Despite expensive memberships, top-notch programs, and paid apps, I felt exhausted and quickly quit if started them at all. Clearly, I lacked motivation and I couldn’t understand why, since I considered myself a goal-oriented person.
The truth was, deep down, I knew that a fit body wouldn’t change my partner’s love, my career, my friends’ opinions, or my life. In fact, I was content with how I looked. Yet, every time I saw others energized by exercise, I felt I was missing something.
This changed in recent years. I found myself traveling extensively and experiencing back pain from carrying heavy hand luggage. My focus shifted from pursuing an ideal body to addressing back pain, increasing energy, and feeling good. I started doing home workouts to improve my back health, and I felt much better as my energy levels increased. Eventually, I developed a passion for working out, making it a permanent part of my life.
Now, what changed? Similar to my previous examples, I finally realized that having a fit body wasn’t my true goal. What I truly wanted all along was to feel good, not to lose weight (I never had significant excess weight). However, tempted by the desire to look like the girl from the fitness center ad I ended up choosing the wrong workouts, which only left me feeling frustrated and fatigued. Once it became clear, there was no longer a need to think about motivation for exercise; it has become a natural part of my routine. As a bonus, I started to look better. This is just another example why it is so important to findin and achieve your main goal, Once you do that – the rest will follow.
Key Takeaways: Embrace Your True Goals for Lasting Motivation
The key to sustaining motivation is choosing the right goals. True desire and determination can compensate for a lack of resources and lead to remarkable achievements. On the other hand, if a goal doesn’t ignite passion, it’s not worth pursuing, as achieving goals without genuine motivation can lead to dissatisfaction and less drive for future endeavors. To avoid chasing goals imposed by others, instead of trying to uncover their reasons, focus on what truly matters to you. Identify your true aspirations and align your actions with them, paying attention to your inner world. In a similar manner, balance multiple goals by prioritizing them, and ensuring your goals don’t conflict but support one another. Once you fulfill your main goal, the remaining goals will follow.
To apply these principles try this: Take some time to reflect on past goals that didn’t work out. Think about why they failed. Then, revise some related goals you’ve put off but could really improve your life. These goals don’t have to be big work-related things. They could be learning a foreign language that would make your life comfortable as an expat, mastering your cooking skills to take better care of your health and your loved ones, implementing self-care routines that would boost your mood for the day, or practicing mindfulness to get a clarity of mind and better focus to achieve your bigger goals. When you achieve these smaller goals, it will make tackling bigger ones much easier. Give it a try and you’ll see how your motivation levels will improve in no time.
The ultimate secret to motivation is setting goals that deeply resonate with you. Pursue what genuinely matters, and motivation will guide you toward lasting success and happiness. By doing so, you will get the maximum enjoyment from what is happening, and you won’t need to look for motivation – it will always be with you.
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